i knew that loving you had its risks

i knew that loving you had its risks because you didn’t care at all. i cared, that’s why i didn’t leave. the scars on your body made me want to make myself better and the scars on mine didn’t phase you at all. you were apart of my healing process and i risked that for you. i risked the motivation i had to heal and now you’ve left me and i’ve given up. i no longer want to heal. it took me forever to get there.

you took that away from me. i risked it all for you. i gave you the power of holding my heart in your hands and you abused that power. you wrapped your soft hands around my tiny heart and squeezed it until it stopped beating.

it was all worth it. every risk. for a while i was dying. for a while i couldn’t hear or say your name without feeling like i was going to choke up. and now? now i know that i gave you everything and you gave me nothing in return. i sacrificed my life, my mind, my body, and my soul, and all for you.

but i will make that mistake over and over again with lover after lover until i am you. until i am somebody who would ruin another human being for their own selfish reasons.

or maybe i wont. i wouldn’t want to be you. because i knew that loving you had its risks, and i wouldn’t want a girl to risk anything for me.



4 thoughts on “i knew that loving you had its risks

  1. speak766 says:

    Heartbreaking, but beautifully written post. You can do better than this person. You can be compassionate, strong, and caring. You don’t have to suck the life out of someone like this person did. Stay strong and keep fighting. Much love – speak766


    • Kaylina Velez says:

      Thank you my love. I think that this comment meant more to me than any other comment I’ve received on this blog. That made me tear up a bit. Lots of love.
      xo Kay


  2. Me says:

    I just wanted to let you know that your blog is amazing. Your posts are beautifully written and your ideas are interesting. That is why I have nominated you for the Liebster Award. ☺ The information can be found on my blog in the last post. You might want to check it out to see what to do. Good luck!!
    Xoxo ❤


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